When Alexander Graham Bell first invented the telephone, President Rutherford B. Hayes made one of the first telephone calls from Washington to Philadelphia and is reported to have said, “An amazing invention, but who would ever want to use one?” Well, in the age of the Internet, we seem to have the same attitude. No one picks up the telephone anymore, and that’s clearly a mistake.
In a world now dominated by e-mail, instant messaging, and web comments, we seem to have lost the art of the telephone call. It’s amazing to me how many people refuse to pick up the telephone, thinking it’s more efficient or easier to send an e-mail. Lobbing an e-mail over a firewall is not as efficient as you think, and it’s certainly not as personal. In my experience, it’s too easy to lose a message in your e-mail box among all the spam and other messages, and e-mail certainly doesn’t have the same sense of urgency as a telephone call.
And what about the need for making a personal connection? One of my great frustrations with electronic communications is that it is so impersonal, and so easy to be misread. You can’t know what type of mood or intention the sender of an e-mail may have, and electronic communications are dashed off so fast these days that people don’t usually stop to think about what their fingers are typing, which leaves a lot of room for miscommunication. Too many times e-mail or text messages are misread not because of the intent of the sender, but because of the way the recipient wrongly reads between the lines.
Let’s face it. We all hide behind electronic communications. You can send an e-mail as a follow-up to an interview, or submit an online job application and tell yourself you have done your job. But e-mail and electronic communications are easy to slough off or ignore altogether. And for those of us who work in an office environment, an ignored e-mail usually generates a second or third e-mail, sometimes adding new recipients or changing the tone in an attempt to get attention.
Pick up the phone! A verbal conversation certainly builds the kind of lasting connection you can never get through e-mail. And it provides an opportunity to exchange information in a way that is more efficient as well as more personal. You can forge a relationship through a telephone conversation you could never achieve in a text message or e-mail exchange. That’s why I host a weekly phone call for new NETSHARE members - so we can talk to each other and exchange ideas. And that’s why we host a weekly Ask the Coach call, so people can listen to one another and hear about each other’s cares and concerns, including the tone and inflection in their voice.
Of course, you need to use proper phone etiquette. You need to be respectful of the other party. If you are calling for the first time, be sure to introduce yourself, state the reason for your call, and then ask if the he or she has time to talk. Then you can engage, discussing the reason for your call and maybe even touching on the weather or some other topics to help lighten the conversation and cement the relationship. My rule is to initiate an important contact with a telephone call and follow-up with an e-mail. It helps to build a relationship and create a written agenda for follow-up.
So do yourself a favor and pick up the phone once in a while. Of course, the other party may choose to ignore your voice mail, but at least you can make an effort to forge a real connection.