Why do people say “Yes” when they really want to say “No”? I know I have been guilty of saying “Yes”, when something inside told me it was a bad idea. It’s even more challenging when times are tough to say “No” to a firm job offer, even though you might feel in your gut it’s not for you.
Go with your gut!
Some define stress is when your gut says “No” but your mouth says “Yes”. You need to have the courage to follow your instincts, and we all know that can be scary.
Of course, when you are under stress trying to find a job, it’s harder to listen to your gut. Your inner signals could be coming from any one of a number of stressmakers, so you need to be clear about how you feel about that job offer before you accept it. Use some tried and true techniques to make sure you are sure:
- Ask for time to consider. There is no reason you should be pressed to accept a job on the spot (unless you are sure it’s the perfect job). Remind the hiring manager that you wouldn’t make a snap decision for his company, so why should you be expected to make a career decision on the spot. Take your time making a decision.
- List the pros and cons. This may seem old-fashioned but it still works. Taking the time to list the pluses and minuses of a new position gives you time to reflect and gather your findings rationally. At the same time, it helps calm you down so you can actually hear your inner voice telling you whether this is a good job for you or not.
- Listen to your instincts. No one knows you better than you, so if something tells you a job isn’t right, believe it!
And if you turn down an offer, don’t worry. There’s a better position around the corner. Or if the job seems right but the terms don’t fit, they’ll come back. As a case in point, early in my career I was offered a job and turned it down (because I was overqualified and the salary was too low), and the interviewer couldn’t believe it. He actually followed me into the parking lot, trying to get me to reconsider. And he called later to offer the same position at a higher salary. I still didn’t take it.
If it’s a good fit, they’ll come back. It it’s not a good fit, don’t be afraid to walk away.
